The Mongoland Cult Diet


elvira
Elvira

"Think before you eat !"




Sonny Landham
Sonny Landham

"Food is important !"




Keanu Reeves
Keanu Reeves

"Don't eat pork !"




Emmylou Harris
Emmylou Harris

"Don't be a pinhead !"




77 steps to a better life



Step 43. Don't purchase or eat octopus. Never touch a dead octopus.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 43 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 44 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
octopus

canned octopus




Step 44. Don't purchase, harvest, or eat mussels. Never touch a dead mussel.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 44 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 45 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
mussels

mussels

mussel with byssus



Step 45. Take omega-3 fish oil and flaxseed oil every day.
If you are a vegetarian, and prefer not to take the fish oil, then double up on the flaxseed oil. Read the list of ingredients on the fish oil, and make sure there is no oil from krill, or anything prohibited in this diet. This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 45 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 46 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
omega-3 fish oil

flaxseed oil



Step 46. Don't eat alligator or crocodile. Never touch a dead alligator or crocodile.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 46 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 47 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
alligator

alligator head

alligator meat

alligator filet

alligator stick



Step 47. If you take a calcium supplement, don't take coral calcium.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 47 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 48 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
coral calcium



Step 48. Eat cinnamon every day, or take a cinnamon capsule.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 48 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 49 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
cinnamon tree

cinnamon sticks

cinnamon capsules



Step 49. Watch Clear and Present Danger.
When you reach this step you must watch the movie regardless of how many times you have seen it before. The third film in the Jack Ryan series (and the last one to star Harrison Ford) deals with America's war on drugs and also the abuse of power in high places. As in Clancy's original novel, the plot hinges on one crucial question: how far can a President go to achieve a laudable goal, even if the means cross moral, legal and international boundaries. Keep practicing the previous steps until you are able to watch it. This step includes all previous steps except the other movie steps. After successfully completing this Step, proceed to Step 50 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01 and when you get to Step 49 you don't have to watch the movie again.



Step 01 - Step 07

Step 08 - Step 14

Step 15 - Step 21

Step 22 - Step 28

Step 29 - Step 35

Step 36 - Step 42

Step 50 - Step 56

Step 57 - Step 63

Step 64 - Step 70

Step 71 - Step 77


ask mongo
mongo
Dear Mongo: I've only lost 5 pounds. I am on Step 35.
Mongo: Losing weight is not the goal of this diet. Don't stop now.



Dear Mongo: At the seafood buffet, I passed by the mussels and ate snapper instead. The next day, I found a $20 bill in my freezer. Wow !
Mongo: That's way cool !



Dear Mongo: My wife has been on your diet for a month. She seems 'nicer' somehow. Life is good.
Mongo: Yay !





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