Step 15. Don't buy or eat cheese that comes in an aerosol can.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 15 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 16 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
Step 16. Don't buy or eat lobster and crawfish.
Never touch a dead lobster. Never touch a dead crawfish. This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 16 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 17 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
Step 17. Drink green tea or black tea every day.
It's starting to look like tea cures everything, including obesity. Available flavored and in decaf, it makes great sun tea. We enjoy making sun tea on sunny, cloudy, and rainy days in an old apple juice jug sitting on a piece of foil. We like to use 10 tea bags per jug, and then we discard them. Drink some, hot or cold, regular or decaf, every day. If you miss a day, you'll have to start the entire diet over. This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 17 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 18 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
Step 18. Take a multivitamin every day.
We like those that contain ginseng, and we usually buy the store-brand-equivalent to save money. If you miss a day, you'll have to start the entire diet over. This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 18 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 19 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
Step 19. Don't buy or eat swordfish. Never touch a dead swordfish.
If you catch one while you're fishing, take a picture and let it go. This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 19 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 20 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
Step 20. Don't buy or eat snails or escargot. Never touch a dead snail.
This step includes all previous steps except the movie steps. After successfully completing Step 20 for 24 hours, proceed to Step 21 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01.
Step 21. Watch Jacob's Ladder.
When you reach this step you must watch the movie regardless of how many times you have seen it before. Too dark and obscure to connect with mainstream audiences, Jacob's Ladder earned a devoted cult following based on its bizarre hallucinatory visuals and terrifying story of a Vietnam veteran apparently suffering a mental breakdown. Keep practicing the previous steps until you are able to watch it. This step includes all previous steps except the other movie steps. After successfully completing this Step, proceed to Step 22 the next day. If you fail on any step, start over the next day on Step 01 and when you get to Step 21 you don't have to watch the movie again.
Dear Mongo: I like to catch crawdads and dress them up with little Barbie outfits. After I play with them for a while, I undress them, and let them go. Is something like that okay ? Mongo: Yes.
Dear Mongo: Yesterday I bought a nutritional supplement called green tea extract, in capsules. Does something like that satisfy the Step 17 requirement. Mongo: Yes.
Dear Mongo: When I go to the movies, I always like to buy one of those 25 pound boxes of Milk Duds. Is that okay ? Mongo: Yes.
