Osama Bin Laden
Admits To Having A Small Penis

"my veener ! eets verry tiny. i can't find it. wah !"




Democrats Win Gold Medals
In Olympic Adultery Competitions

John Edwards (D-NC) Former 2008 Democratic Presidential Candidate and North Carolina Senator - admitted to an extramarital adulterous affair to Rielle Hunter while his wife was battling cancer, but denies that he fathered Hunter's child (August 8, 2008). A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.


Marc Dann (D-OH) Ohio Attorney General - extramarital adulterous affair, sexual harassment, and other unlawful acts. He chose to resign his office in 2008. A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.



Paul J. Morrison (D-KS) Kansas Attorney General - extramarital adulterous affair with an office administrator, and sexual harassment claims. He chose to resign his office in 2008. A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.



Eliot Spitzer (D-NY) New York Governor - extramarital adulterous affairs, paying up to $80,000 for prostitutes over a period of several years while he was Attorney General, and later as Governor. He chose to resign his office in 2008. A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.



Kwame Kilpatrick (D-MI) Detroit Mayor - extramarital adulterous affair with his Chief-of-Staff, Christine Beatty. On March 24, 2008, Kilpatrick was charged with eight felony counts, including perjury, misconduct in office, and obstruction of justice. On August 7, 2008, Mayor Kilpatrick was incarcerated in the Wayne County Jail upon an order issued by Judge Ronald Giles for violating the terms of his bond, becoming the first mayor in Detroit's history to be ordered to jail while in office. On August 8, 2008, Michigan's Attorney General, Mike Cox, announced two new felony counts had been filed against Kilpatrick for assaulting and interfering with a law officer. In August 2008, he is still the mayor. A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.



Antonio Villaraigosa (D-CA) Los Angeles Mayor - extramarital adulterous affair. While his wife was undergoing treatment for thyroid cancer, Villaraigosa left town for a few days (with no notice) with a friend's wife. Corina Villaraigosa has filed for divorce. He believes that lying, cheating, and committing adultery does not affect a politicians performance, and is still the mayor of LA in August of 2008. A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.



Gavin Newsom (D-CA) San Francisco Mayor - admitted having an extramarital adulterous affair with the wife of his campaign manager and former deputy chief-of-staff Alex Tourk (2007). A typical lying, and cheating democrat. There are many more.





How To Kill Chickens
A Tutorial


Many of us love to eat chicken. Some of us raise our own chickens, and then eat them. Before we eat a chicken, it must be killed, and there are a variety of fun ways to do it. Over the next several days, we'll look at some of the more popular techniques.

And then I may or may not kill a chicken.

"Dad, can we kill some chickens today ?"

"Sorry, not today son."




Technique One:
While The Chicken Is Alive,
Yank Its Head Off With Your Bare Hands
Some people consider this to be the most humane way to kill a chicken. Perhaps it isn't. First grab and hold the chicken as seen in this first photo. Then, push down, as seen in the second photo, until the head just pops right off. The details of this technique are described here.



"Dad, can I play video games today ?"

"Sorry, not today son. Too violent. Kill some chickens instead, okay ?"



Technique Two:
The Kentucky Fried Chicken Method

First, hang the chickens alive and upside-down on metal hooks. Then pass them through an apparatus which usually kills them quickly by usually removing the head with a whirring blade. The details of this technique are described here.



Technique Three:
While The Chicken Is Alive,
Hang It Upside Down By The Feet
And Slit Its Throat Or Cut Off Its Head
Many people consider this to be the most humane way to kill a chicken. You'll need a bucket to catch the blood. As you can see from the second photo, this is the favorite method for children.



"Dad, I'm tired of playing with my Barbie. Can I kill some chickens ?"

"Yes, but only if you take your little sister !"



Technique Four:
While The Chicken Is Alive,
Wring Its Neck Until It Breaks
Breaking a chicken's neck is a very popular technique, because it can be accomplished in so many different ways. After the chicken dies, you will still need to slit its throat or cut off its head, and hang the chicken upside down to drain out the blood. To avoid a large mess, it is best to catch the blood in a bucket. Whenever I can't find a bucket, I use the crystal salad bowl I received as a wedding gift years ago.





Technique Five:
While The Chicken Is Alive,
Chop Off Its Head
Most people believe that the chicken is dead the moment its head gets chopped off. They think the chicken is dead while it's still flopping around all over the place. They are wrong, and people that think that are stupid idiots. If something is dead, and is moving around, it is a zombie, and not a chicken. Duh ! The movement we see after a chicken loses its head is the normal reaction to pain, suffering, and the stress of knowing your head just got chopped off, and the knowledge that you are in the process of dying. The chicken in the following photograph lived for 18 months after having its head chopped off. You probably don't believe me. The second photo is a plate full of chicken heads ready to be processed into chicken nuggets.






two of mongo's nine chickens

, “i did not become a vegetarian for my health, i did it for the health of the chickens.” -- isaac bashevis singer (polish-born american writer 1904-1991)

You have stumbled into.....
Mongoland


did i startle you (wav 25k) dock that chink a day's pay (wav 225k) do what he say do what he say (wav 58k) do you hear me (wav 126k) give me a hand with the bags (wav 59k) go and tell your master (wav 62k) come on in (wav 46k) could you repeat that sir (wav 547k) crucifixion lasts for hours (wav 74k)



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Mongo's Examined Life Wednesday February 03, 2010: 224.0 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 27, meat: beef, chicken
Monday February 01, 2010: 225.2 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 27, meat: beef, salmon
Wednesday November 11, 2009: 220.4 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 1, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 30, meat: 0
Tuesday November 10, 2009: 221.6 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 30, meat: beef, chicken
Wednesday August 19, 2009: 214.0 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 27, meat: 0
Sunday August 16, 2009: 215.4 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 26, meat: chicken, beef, anchovies
Sunday March 29, 2009: ? lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 00, meat: beef, bacon
Saturday March 28, 2009: ? lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 3, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 00, meat: beef, salmon
Friday March 27, 2009: 206.2 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 1, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 00, meat: beef, sardines
Thursday March 26, 2009: 207.0 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 00, meat: chicken
Monday March 09, 2009: 208.6 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 09, meat: turkey, chicken
Monday February 23, 2009: 207.0 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 26, meat: pollock, beef
Monday February 09, 2009: 206.8 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 21, meat: pollock, tuna, snapper
Monday January 26, 2009: 206.6 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 16, meat: beef
Monday January 12, 2009: 209.2 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, tequila 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling -16, vit 0, meat: pollock, chicken
Monday Dec 29, 2008: 206.2 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, margarita 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 15, meat: pollock, chicken
Saturday Dec 13, 2008: 204.6 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 2, margarita 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling -21, vit 15, meat: beef, venison, lamb
wed sep 10, 2008: 199.8 lbs, tobacco 0, beer 0, wine 0, margarita 0, cocaine 0, meth 0, pot 0, sex 0, mast 0, porn 0, lies 0, anger 0, gambling 0, vit 12, meat: chicken
Wednesday August 20: 202.4 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Tuesday August 19: 202.2 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Monday August 18: 200.2 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 1, Gambling -57, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Saturday August 16: ? lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 1, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Friday August 15: 203.0 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Thursday August 14: 203.4 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Wednesday August 13: 204.2 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 7, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: albacore, pollock
Tuesday August 12: 203.6 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 2, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Monday August 11: 203.2 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 1, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Sunday August 10: 203.8 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 10, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Saturday August 09: ? lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 2, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 9, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Friday August 08: 203.6 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 8, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Thursday August 07: 204.2 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 7, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Wednesday August 06: 205.0 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 2, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 6, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Tuesday August 05: 206.0 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 5, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Monday August 04: ? lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 2, Gambling 0, Vit 1, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef
Sunday August 03: 206.4 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 11, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: cod, anchovies
Saturday August 02: ? lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 4, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: 0
Friday August 01: 204.8 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 1, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 5, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef, anchovies
Thursday July 31: 205.2 lbs, Tobacco 0, Beer 0, Wine 0, Margarita 0, Cocaine 0, Meth 0, Pot 0, Mast 0, Porn 0, Lies 0, Anger 0, Gambling 0, Vit 0, Pork 0, Shellfish 0, Meat: beef